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Paula Trucks-Pape's avatar

First of all, this: "I'm slowly learning to be someone who can embody my dream."

Second, this: I finally have a novel, or a series of stories, that is grounded in a female character who:

1. knows what she wants

2. realizes that her circumstances may prevent her from achieving what she wants

3. chooses to run away from her dream instead and sequester herself

4. forgets what she wants

5. experiences psychological and physical upheaval that reveals what she continues to want

6. figures out how to move through anger, regret, self-loathing, etc. to work toward what she wants and realizes that working in this way is enough

She's the daughter of a 12th century craftsman and the stories will explore issues related to gender, socioeconomics, education, creativity and magic, and the ever-changing natural world.

Third, this: I spend two to four hours a day actively resisting this work by applying for jobs I don't want to do, making lists of tasks and errands unrelated to this work, pretending that sorting email messages is productive, and worrying about the income I'm not earning as I procrastinate.

Gunter Grass, a writer I admire, talks about approaching writing and creative work as "crabwalking," moving sideways toward an object as you look at it from the corner of your eye because looking at it directly -- really seeing your goal, your dream -- will surely stop you from pursuing it. So every day, as long as I can remain in awareness, I manage a step or two down an oblique path toward my goal.

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Donna McArthur's avatar

This is a fascinating comment thread following an excellent post, thank you Jennifer. Top drawer as usual💕

I am currently working on a series about change, laying out the tools we can implement to be able to move toward Wholeness and that thing our soul is calling us to do. Reading the comments here I see that so many of us know what we want but the stumbling blocks seem to be:

1. logistics - life is in the way, such as children, parents, day jobs, reality that cannot be changed;

perhaps in these situations, we are being called to hold on to moments and, as Paula said in the comments, travel obliquely toward our hearts desire, rather than facing it head on.

2. trust - developing an innate trust in our ability to pull it off, I think this takes practice and if we start with the little things and notice them, pay attention and cement them into our consciousness it lays down an imprint that we can take on more than we think. So often we aren't confident in our ability because it gets eroded by lack of attention and comparing ourselves to those further along the path. Intentional effort at noticing ourselves stepping up to the plate may make a difference.

3. surrender - I am talking about surrendering to the process and the effort, recognizing the journey, and allowing it to unfold. Releasing our expectations of the outcome (this is super difficult to do in real life, at least for me) but perhaps it is the whole point?

After achieving my dreams of getting a degree and becoming a Mom, one of my biggest dreams was to ditch the alcohol in my life. This seemed unrealistic for years until I started to put a process in place to make it become a reality (yay!). Now my dream is to implement more fun in my life (I know it sounds like something from a SNL skit but I really need it) so I am working on a plan for that because, at 57, it's not coming naturally🤣

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