16 Comments

This is so excellent, Jen. #6 is the juice to all the squeezes for me right now. This the crux: "I could easily keep my business going and write my novel more slowly but I’ve decided to honor the urgency I feel to get this book out into the world. But again: terrified." I have to keep reminding myself that it's okay, more than okay, to honor the urgency. How lucky am I to feel the urgency to do something anyway. To want something that much. To feel called/drawn/excited. How cool is that? Such a good list to pin to the wall. Thank you!

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I’m so excited for your retreat in May!!!

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I’m so excited to meet you!

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THIS! "If we don’t know what matters to us and if we don’t know what our financial needs are, selfishness is just a cultural story that urges us to neglect our own desires."

I've had a big wake-up call this year as my husband got ill and has had to reduce his workload. I've supported him in his business for 25 years and realised I have nothing to show for it financially speaking. To be blunt, if he dies I can downsize and sell the house and manage. If he becomes ill and needs care I'm/we're stuffed!

I want to explore selfishness more. I want to be selfish more. I want to embody it more and I want others (especially over caring types) to do the same. It is not selfish to take care of our own needs. It is practical, prudent, realistic and the best gift we can give our loved ones.

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Absolutely!! I’m such a huge advocate for women taking care of themselves financially!!

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So much of this resonated, particularly- “To stay with a desire, we must build a new identity. This takes far more time than we think it will. Are you allowing enough time to become the person who can embody this dream?”

Ah, the virtue of patience to get us closer to true desire. The waiting is the hardest part (Petty was right!) but often so worth it. Thanks for this reminder, Jen! 🫶

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This is SO good Jen, thank you and well done! I am currently working on a piece about changing our life to move closer to wholeness, to our truest self. In it I talk about exactly what you said in #5, that it requires us to change who we are, our identity. For example , when I quit drinking I knew I needed to BECOME a non-drinker in my mind first because I could not be sober and have a glass of wine at the same time! This takes tremendous effort but is worth the work.

I appreciate these reminders. The one that I most need to work on is to work more. Throw everything I've got at it. I will come back to this essay many times for these ideas❤

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Thanks Donna that’s so kind!! And many congratulations on your sobriety.

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Brilliant 🤩 this really helped me get focused! Thank you 🙏

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oh that makes me so happy!!!

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Love this, Jenn!

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That means so much!!

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"Are you allowing enough time to become the person who can *embody * this dream?" Oof. I felt that. (and I also lost all concentration after hot chocolate chip cookies were mentioned).

I recall you saying once that we need to "carve out" the time - so true, and often, so challenging. Thank you. Love.

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Patience is so not my virtue 🤓

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This really resonates with me, Jen, especially number five. Thanks for giving me permission to allow time to grow into the new identity I always claimed I wanted. Because I do want it. Your words always make me think about and see myself in new ways. Thank you for that!

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That’s so lovely to hear this morning! Thank you Mary!

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